This season on The Hills

The Hills mini-season recap



Paris!
Lauren and Whitney went to Paris to work for Teen Vogue during the Crillon Ball. Those debutante girls were gorgeous and had amazing gowns. That was pretty much the best thing that happened in that episode. MTV hired some French band to squire the girls around, go to the Eiffel Tower and give Lauren a romantic ride on a Vespa around Paris at night. Sounds great, for a movie, but this is "reality" TV. Among the dumb things Lauren does: take personal calls while at work, decide to pick up ball gowns before deb girls shoes (the store is closed!!), wear said ball gown on night out, make it home safe and the burn it with a curling iron (btw, Lauren actually can sew!) and finally wear new ball gown out on Vespa with dirty French boy. All in all, not smart.

She-Pratt
This season Stephanie Pratt has made a play for friendship with Lauren, much to Spencer's delight. Note sarcasm. He calls her another Brody, makes her cry and he's squatting in her apartment. What a douchebag. Stephanie is in Lauren's computer class is FIDM and is slowly weaseling her way in. She says she wants to help LC and Heidi be friends again, lets be real, she's looking for some quality screen time.

Spencer

First, this is too funny to not share.



He is a douche and Heidi is still with him, though on the season they've "broken up". Gimme a break. We've all seen the Easter pics. Gag!



Audrina is partying, Whitney is working and Lo is being the awesomest girl that she is! LC that's your true friend. Get rid of She-Pratt listen to Lo and Brody and move on.

Coming soon on the Hills....Stephen.

Eli Stone and Miss Guided

Eli Stone aired 4/3/08

Tonight on Eli Stone he defends his brother in court, Dowd tries get SpyDaddy's approval and Maggie gets engaged. Finally, his brother believes him. Eli has some incredible visions, or flashback of his brothers memories while defending him in a trial. Eli discovers that Nate made the decision to not let his dad have a heart that could have saved him and Nate has carried that guilt for years. While the case was interesting, the chemistry of the brothers was more amazing. Eli feeling like Nate doesn't understand him and Nate feeling like Eli doesn't take the case seriously enough. In the end Eli wins and the bros have a drink and come to an understanding of one another. Meanwhile, Matt is trying to get approval to date Taylor from Jordan, after Taylor said she couldn't date co-workers, which she made up just to get him off her back. Jordan freaks and tells Eli, fireworks ensue. Maggie is engaged and Eli is shocked as he assumed she's in love with him, which she is. It was another great hour and one of my favorite new shows!

Miss Guided aired 4/3/08



Miss Saigon on Miss Guided! Becky produces the school musical, Miss Saigon. First she picks the girl who never gets the starring role to star. This girl CANNOT sing! The girl who can sing is shocked she didn't get the part. Tim is so proud of Becky and her producing he asks her to a celebratory dinner. Unfortunately, Becky gets so engrossed she alienates everyone and accidentally causes Tim to cut off part of his thumb. Meanwhile, Bruce is attempting to woo Lisa by exploiting her insecurities because that's what "The Game" (a book) told him to do. I think that must have been written by a man. She does drunkenly kiss him, but then immeadiatly passes out. In the end, Becky gets kissed by a student in the school play because her lead bails. But the kids loved the play so she doesn't get fired.

On the next half hour and the season finale :( Becky and Lisa compete for Tim's affection. Lisa has the early edge. Plus Rumer Willis guest stars in a role with about 3 lines. Which I am guessing is all she can handle. Hmmm.....I wonder how she got that role? I just want to say Team Becky! Take Lisa down, although Lisa has the early edge on the Tim competition. I hope this show comes back, I enjoy it!

Eli Stone, Big Bang Theory, HIMYM, Real World Awards

Eli Stone aired 3/27/08

This week George Michael is back! But for real this time, he's hired Eli to represent a girl who has been expelled from school for playing one his songs during an abstinence rally. Apparently the principal didn't feel "I Want Your Sex" was appropriate, of course if he understood the song, he might have felt differently. Who knew that Jordan Weathersby was a George Michael fanboy? That had to be the best part of the show, Victor Garber playing a distinguished lawyer, who loves George Michael and sings Elton John. Plus, Taylor and whatshisface lawyer guy hooking up! Eli sees them singing "I Got You Babe" confronts Taylor she denies anything happening and then ends up hooking up with him. What a dumbass! This is still one of my favorite new shows of the year!

CBS Comedy night The Big Bang Theory and How I Met Your Mother 3/31/08

This week on the Big Bang Theory, Sheldon is sick and everyone else is in hiding. Poor Penny is left to deal with him. She's forced to care for him while the boys hide out in a theatre for a Planet of the Apes marathon. Disaster strikes when Leonard's glasses are broken and he must go in to the apartment without being caught by Sheldon, who has taken Penny hostage in his misery. She's rubbing vaporub on his chest and singing the Soft Kitty song. In the end Leonard is busted by Penny and she sells him out in order to make a quick escape. Sheldon is one annoying sick genius.

On How I Met Your Mother, Barney creates a bracket of the top 64 women he's hooked up with to figure out who is bad mouthing him to the women of NYC. The scene where they are going through the bracket is hilarious. "Evil twin trumps 12 hours to live!!" After tracking down the final 4, we discover a Cinderella story in the making. The mystery woman is not in the bracket! We still don't know who she is but I imagine will someday!

Plus one girl still thinks he is Ted Mosby and created a website!

http://www.tedmosbyisajerk.com/



The best part of the whole episode was the last minute. When Barney is writing his blog and the music that played over him as Doogie Howser came on. I laughed hard, for a few minutes. It was awesome.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uA_jknzmz0




Real World Awards aired 4/2/08

Lame, obviously who ever was allowed to vote on this didn't watch the first 7 season or so. Which by the way are the best. Tyrie and Davis are best fight over Kevin and Julie from season 1? Austin cast is favorite? Johnny Bananas is hottest guy? (Have they seen Jason from the Seattle cast?) Overall, it was cool to see people from the past seasons, but the awards were lame. I wish MTV would stop casting people who are competing for biggest whore, or who can consume the most alcohol without being arrested. It used to be about young people looking to the future and now it's about who can party hardest in the present. LAME!

The Big Bang Theory, HIMYM, Eli Stone, The Gauntlet Reunion

CBS Comedy night 3/24/08 The Big Bang Theory and How I Met Your Mother

The geeks on the Big Bang Theory cannot tell a good lie. Upon hearing Penny's "singing" while walking up stairs the boys wonder if there is perhaps a cat dying. Once the realize that Penny is in fact going to be performing Leonard comes up with a reasonable lie for he and Sheldon cannot attend. Penny is disappointed, but doesn't press the issue. Later that night, filled with guilt Sheldon confronts Leonard telling him he doesn't like lying to Penny. Leonard kicks him out. The following morning Sheldon confesses to Penny that Leonard lied, but instead of telling the truth he concocts an even more elaborate lie that involves a guest appearance from that annoying guy from the movie "The New Guy". In the end Penny never finds out they didn't want to go cause she sucks at singing. Not the best ep yet, but still funny.



On How I Met Your Mother we got two guest stars. Dr. Elliot Reed (aka Sarah Chalke) and it's Britney Bitch. Chalke plays a dermatologist removing Ted's tramp stamp that Mandy Moore convinced him to get earlier this season. Seriously, who let's Mandy Moore convince them to get a tattoo? Ted falls for the lovely and charming Dr. right away. But she tells him upfront that she can't date patients and even after they are done with their sessions, she'll still say no. Undaunted, Ted works her over with his charm trying to illicit the yes he wants. Meanwhile, her receptionist Abby (played by Spears) falls for Ted. In the end Ted finds out she doesn't date because she has a daughter, she tells him she barely has 2 minutes for lunch. Ted devises a two minute date. A series of things you would on a normal date, but in two minutes. It was sweet, but I don't think it helped him win the girl. What happened with Abby, she fell for the Barnacle!

Eli Stone aired 3/20/08



This week Eli defends the man who is tearing down Patty's neighborhood. Sadly, no George Michael this episode, (but he'll be back this week!) but a great hour none the less. Patty's neighborhood is being replaced with condos and her community is fighting it, as most would. Condo construction is out of hand! In the end, the developer wins, the people lose (they should have taken the settlement, they would have gotten more) and Eli feels rotten. He fought so hard because a vision told him an earthquake would hit and kill people in that area. He wanted to save them and in the end the quake didn't come. Patty's pissed at him for taking the case and he's mad at god for making him think he's a prophet. Plus in the episode that baseball player has a mistrial and can't be charged again due to double jeopardy. He got away with murder.

The Gauntlet Reunion: Trim the Fat aired 3/26/08

Some of cast of the Gauntlet reunited for a special this week. Mostly it was about Coral ripping Ev a new one. It was fantastic, if you haven't seen it watch. Because no recap I could make could do it justice.

Here are some of my comments I posted on a message board as Iwatched the episode:

• Go Coral! She's kicking ass, I wish she would make Ev cry. What a bitch!
• Kenny is an idiot, but he's hot.
• I love Coral and she looks hot. Katie, Brad and Coral are awesome, everyone else is lame. LOL, GROW SOME GONADS. Damn, Coral is rippin' on Ev hard. Ev has 2 assholes now!
• Coral and Katie need their own show. Coral is playing the victim? Coral is the killer man!!
• Does anyone else want to rip off Ev's nose? Brad has an insurance agency?
• Man Ev looked like a wounded puppy at the end.

This weekend new Eli Stone, Smallville, Reaper and I'll finally watch Emma (Masterpiece).

My weekend of TV watching

This weekend I spent some quality time with my tivo. Time to share some thoughts on Lost, Jericho, How I Met Your Mother, The Big Bang Theory and The Return of Jezebel James.

The Return of Jezebel James aired 3/21/08

All I can say is despite my love for Parker Posey as an actress this show has been a disappointment. Even with show runner Amy Sherman-Palladino of Gilmore Girls, it cannot be saved. I love seeing Scott Cohen on the screen. (The delicious Max Medina for you non-Gilmore viewers, shame on you.) But even his presence and the greatness of Parker cannot make this show watchable. The laugh track is annoying and the lack of chemistry between PP and Lauren Ambrose as sisters makes for 30 min of torture. Unfortunate, but true. I don't think this show will be getting another view on the tivo from me.

CBS Comedies How I Met Your Mother and The Big Bang Theory aired 3/17/08



I love the Big Bang Theory. Sheldon is the most abrasive, rude character on TV in a while and I love him. But I love geeks. This week against Sheldon's wishes Leonard presents a paper on some stuff I can't pretend to understand ending in an all out cat fight in front of their fellow geeks. Of course Howard took the opportunity to make a nice You Tube video of it.
View here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMA_mMG1Scg

On How I Met Your Mother, Ted learns that being Barney isn't all that great. While the rewards he reaped from living like there was no tomorrow were fun. He realized that they made him someone he didn't want to be. There's only room for one Barney on this show and NPH plays him perfectly. We caught another glimpse of the famous yellow umbrella bringing us one step closer to finding out who the mother is. Good thing Ted didn't meet her that night, she probably wouldn't have liked him. Not the funniest HIMYM ever, although Marshall and Lily's crooked apartment is pretty funny, but better than 2.5 Men.

Lost aired 3/20/08

Why? Why would Sayid sell out Michael before finding out all the details?!?!?! It must be why, when they get off that island Sayid works for Ben. Not enough Desmond for my taste, but then I love him. What's going to happen with that? Who killed Karl? Is Rousseau a goner? Did she and Ben plan it Karl couldn't knock up their daughter? Are the freighters going to kill everyone? Argh.... my brain!!

Jericho aired 3/18/08

Mama Green is back and helping to spring him from Beck's clutches. Beck is on a manhunt for Stanley after the killing of that Ravenwood guy, whose name escapes me currently. John Smith sells out Hawkins to Beck as the terrorist and the bomb is on it's way to Cheyenne where the mastermind of it all, John Smith can take out J & R and the new regime at once. Hawkins is right though, it will only kill innocents and in the end make the problem worse. Since Jericho is officially dead next weeks series finale better be awesome!

NBC.com

I also spent a good part of Sat afternoon watching quartlife on nbc.com and catching up on Chuck. Both are awesome and should be watched.

What do you think of the shows in this post? Put your responses in the comments section below.

Tonight time for the drama The Hills returns with an all new hour. TV guiltiest pleasure is back.

Miss/Guided, Reaper 3/20/08

Miss/Guided aired 3/20/2008



Miss/Guided premiered on it's normal night last night. The show is about Becky Freely (played by Judy Greer), a high school guidance counselor at the same school she attended as a youth. She's optimstic, bright, funny and sometimes slightly annoying due to all those perky characteristics. But the good outweighs the bad. Becky is in love with the schools spanish teacher, Tim O'Malley (played by Kristoffer Polaha). Tim is sweet, but not always that smart. He means well, eventhough he barely speaks spanish as he was the school auto shop teacher, but the principal was deperate and hired him. Becky's high school nemesis, (in her mind at least) is Lisa Germaine (played by Brooke Burns). Lisa is beautiful, but annoying. Lisa was the cheerleader and Becky was the uber-nerd. The dry, sarcastic Principal Huffy is great in the scenes he pops up in and the Vice Principal Terry (played by Chris Parnell) is hilarious. If you haven't watched you should.

You can watch full episodes online at abc.com.
http://dynamic.abc.go.com/streaming/landing?lid=ABCCOMGlobalMenu&lpos=FEP

Last nights episodes were funny. Ashton Kutcher guested in the first half hour called "The Sub", he played a substitute spanish teacher the school falls for including Becky. Beaux (that's with an X) develops a crush on Becky and the attention distracts Becky from helping Tim keep his job, which is threatened by the charismatic Beaux. In the end, Beaux is let go for not having a college degree and Tim keeps his job.

Second on the List, the school's very own Perez Hilton going by the name Lindsay Lopez, has a gossip "blarg" (as Becky calls it) about students and staff in the school. Including the most do-able teacher list. Lisa is of course #1, while poor Becky is #18 and actually falls to #40 at one point below a teacher from the school who is now deceased. Becky goes to Forever 21 and shops till she drops in an attempt to raise her standing, but only falls further. In the end she manages number 1 status by showing her "britney" to the world during a charity carwash at the school.

Miss/Guided is fun, light and hilarious. Maybe not the best match for Lost. I think this would make a fantastic pairing with Samatha Who?

Reaper aired 3/20/08



Last night Sam, Sock and Ben try to send an invisible soul back to Hell and Sam debates whether or not to end his relationship with Katie. He thinks Katie is the Devil's daughter, the Devil denies it of course! In the previous episode Sock was kicked out by his mom and forced to find a place on his own. When squatting in the Work Bench doesn't quite work out he forges Sam and Ben's signatures on a lease and the boys move in together. The find living on their own fun and even replaced their mom's with the Domestic Gods next door. Although as Sam finds at the end, Gods isn't accurate when he sees them sanding down their Demon horns.

What else happened:

• Sam does manage to catch the invisible soul who made the Unabomber look like a social butterfly, according to the Devil.
• Katie senses Sam pushing her away and decides to take a break.
• The boys play Wii on 3 giant flat screens.
• I wonder how well they get paid at the work bench!

This weekend:

Lost, Eli Stone, Smallville, How I Met Your Mother, The Big Bang Theory and one more chance to The Return of Jezebel James. Plus Emma is on Masterpiece Classics and somewhere in there I get some sleep!

RW/RR Challenge: The Gauntlet III, Finale

Aired 3/19/08 Spoilers if you haven't already seen it!



This concludes the crappiest challenge MTV has aired. The Veteran team dominated the challenge this season. They won 10 of the 15 challenges prior to final "Army Strong" fiasco. Most of the 5 losses were due to the guys throwing the challenge in order to "trim the fat" or get rid of some female contenders. If only they had trimmed Eric like Johnny Bananas suggested early in the game. He told them Big Easy would be dead weight and hurt them in end, and he was right.

The Army Strong challenge was a foot race along the beach in Mexico. It started with a 1/2 miles swim to shore. Once they reached the shore the teams became linked with chains and can only disconnect when instructed. There were 4 checkpoints, each one based on a previous game.

Big E could barely make the swim without the assistance of CT. How he expected to make the rest of the race is beyond me. After the 2nd checkpoint Big Easy fell and Ev, CT and others became upset with him for causing them to lose 300,000 or 30,000 per person. What is more imporant, your friends life or money? Clearly for most of these douchebags it's the money. Brad seemed to be the only one who cared that there was something wrong. The medics take Eric away, Evan rallies the vets to finish for Big Easy, even if the rooks are sipping wine and celebrating.

To the vets surprise the rooks have not yet finished the "I Dig You" checkpoint. The vets renewed with excitement manage to unearth the chest containing their flag and raise it first. However, TJ doesn't sound the horn, the rules stated that the beginning that all members of the team must complete the race to win. Because Eric didn't the vets were disqualified.

The rooks celebrate their "victory" and the vets weep sadly. It was lame finale, MTV needs to find less douche-y people to play. Bring back some old school cast members.

Coming soon on MTV, The Hills 3.5